Why I Couldn't Sleep in Paris

Hey, it’s Bailey! I just got back from solo travelling around Europe for the past 17 days, I missed you.

So I stayed in hostels for my entire trip and before heading to Paris, I was in London and Amsterdam. In both rooms I had men that snored, so I was really looking forward to my all-female dorm in Paris because as we all know, women don’t snore, right? WRONG.

I get into my room and there are two girls there and the first thing they tell me is, “just warning you, but you’re not going to sleep tonight.”

Greeeeeeeeeeat. That’s exactly what you want to hear when you’re tired from a day of travelling. They then tell me about how this other lady checked into the room yesterday, let’s call her “Matilda,” and Matilda* warned the other seven people last night that she “snores a bit.”

It turns out, by “snores a bit” she meant “I’m going to make such a racket with my mouth that you’re not going to be able to sleep until at least 4 AM.”

They tell me that Matilda* then snored loudly and ceaselessly until about 2AM when one of the girls in the room finally got SO fed up that she got out of bed, woke up Matilda*, and told her she needed to leave.

The girl in the room told Matilda* “you’re snoring is too loud, you’re keeping everyone awake in the room. And probably not just the room but the entire floor!” So Matilda* gets up, slightly bewildered, and heads to the lobby because she doesn’t know what to do.

She returns shortly after because, obviously, she can’t just be kicked out of the room she’s paid good money to sleep in, and calls her dad to tell him what happened.

His response: “Some people fart and some people snore, tell them to get over it and stop being rude.”

Well then. . . interesting analogy.

So after Matilda* gets off the phone she goes right back to sleep like nothing happened.

It sounds like I’m in for an eventful night.

That night, the seven of us are just hanging out in the room, talking and waiting for Matilda* to return for the evening and around 11 PM, the star of the show arrives!

Now, the rest of just continue to keep talking and Matilda joins in for a bit, but out of nowhere she is DEAD asleep and the snoring begins.

Matilda* was a seriously heavy sleeper. Despite having the lights on and us speaking at regular sleeping level, she did not wake up. Not even once. She was even loud enough that she would interrupt us mid-sentence.

Her log-sawing serenade continued till about 4 AM until her snoring finally subsided long enough for everyone to fall asleep.

THANKFULLY Matilda* was leaving for the South of France that day so there wasn’t going to be an encore the following night.